Sen. Joe Biden should have submitted his speech to a few more editors before going live Aug. 27. Linguistically, it was the sloppiest of the DNC’s keynoters.

First there was the reference to his late father. “I wish that my dad was here tonight,” Biden said.

Anytime you describe a condition contrary to fact, you’re using the subjunctive mood, which requires the verb were, rather than was. (Here’s a clue: A sentence that begins with “I wish” is subjunctive.”

Then there were the plural pronouns Biden linked to singular nouns and pronouns. In articulating what every young Democrat apparently hears from his parents, Biden said, “We were told that anyone can make it if they try.” Anyone is a singular pronoun, so Biden should have said, “Anyone can make it he or she tries.” That may not sound as smooth, but it’s grammatically correct. If you don’t like the sound, rework the sentence. But please don’t settle it by throwing out a they.

Biden also misused the word react. “You can learn an awful lot about a man campaigning with him, debating him and seeing how he reacts under pressure,” Biden said of Sen. Obama.

A reaction is a sudden, spontaneous response to a stimulus, such as shrieking, shouting, laughing or crying. It is not a synonym for opinion, judgment or any kind of measured response.

Surely Obama reacts to campaign pressure. Perhaps he cusses. Maybe he sweats. But that kind of impulsive behavior is not what Biden intended to describe. He was referring to high-road responses and wise decisions in the face of campaign pressure. Instead he got us wondering how, in the moment of heat, Obama reacts to stimulus. And that’s not something a politician would want us to ponder.

Lastly, Biden noted Obama’s fiscal record: “…because Barack made that choice, working families in Illinois pay less taxes…”

If you can count items individually, use fewer. If not, use less. Taxes are countable. That’s what makes them so odious; we count those dollars and are painfully aware of just how many we fork over. (An alternative wording would have been “lower taxes” to convey a lower dollar amount.)

If Biden had made fewer linguistic mistakes, our perception of him would be less jaded.

QUICK HITS

* Kim Kardashian hopes the “continuous” exercise for Dancing with the Stars will “firm” up her large, legendary derrière. The problem? Continuous means uninterrupted, while continual means steadily repeated. Though Kim is logging in long days on the dance floor, we know she’s taking some breaks.

* Sen. Barack Obama was so proud of his wife’s DNC speech that he sent out a 108-word e-mail containing four dashes, none of which is correct. Dashes should be used sparingly. They signal interruption, emphasize a word and enclose a thought.

* That speech Sen. Obama loved? Not so pleasing to a grammarian. Michelle Obama used the word like as a conjunction, which has the power to link two clauses, both of which contain verbs. But like is not a conjunction. She said her husband was raised “by a single mother who struggled to pay the bills just like we did.” She should’ve said, “…just as we did.”