While addressing the media this morning, words flowed out of President Bush’s mouth as gracefully as china tumbling down a staircase.

“I called my cabinet together for them to get a full understanding of the extraordinary actions we’ve taken,” he began.

To call a cabinet together “for them to get a full understanding” is a juvenile and awkward sentence construction. A much smoother wording would’ve been to call them together “in order for them to gain a full understanding.”

Second, a mathematical problem: We’ve got a singular a cabinet and a plural pronoun, them. It’s not very encouraging when the man who’s supposed to be rectifying our economy loses track of numbers in a two-second span.

That wasn’t the president’s only mathematical lapse. He also said, “Decisions we took to enhance liquidity and make sure our financial instruments are strong is a temporary decision.”

Multiple decisions inexplicably turned into “a…decision.” Hm.

Another plural turned singular when the president said, “For example, the equity purchases in the banks is designed so that these shares will eventually be sold back to the government.”

Multiple purchases are designed, W.

As usual, the president’s diction made for some confounding statements. Consider this remark:

These are extraordinary measures, no question about it. But they’re well thought out, they are necessary, and I’m confident in the long run this economy will come back.

Here’s another case of poor word choice:

The liquidity measures being taken are structured such that the government will be a passive investor.

Such that, a popular phrase when you’re hoping to sound academic, works when you’re referring to a noun. (The arrangement is such that we should see improvements in the coming weeks.) But when you’re modifying a verb, such as structured, use so that. The liquidity measures being taken are structured so that the government will be a passive investor.

The president managed to squeeze in a couple of more errors before he wrapped up his brief address. In his closing, he said, “I’m looking forward to going to Michigan today to talk to small business owners and community bankers and workers that have been affected by the economy.” The problem: that is for objects and unnamed animals, while who is for people and named animals. Not a great way to show respect for the business owners and community bankers you claim to be championing.

President Bush’s final statement was also a clunker.

And I’m looking forward to sharing my thoughts about why the government has taken these temporary measures designed to make sure that their lives are going to have the best shot at dealing with this financial crisis.

Their lives will have a shot at dealing with this out-of-body crisis. They will be left to hope that their lives perform well — better than the grammatically-challenged president.